Stats taken during the 4-kyuu exam, as collected during sweeping surveys of room 404:

  • 3 test segments
  • 104 questions
  • 40 test takers
  • 17 Caucasians
  • 4 annoying college girls who giggled and bragged about answers they got right in between exam segments
  • 13 moments of panic
  • 6 moments of insecurity
  • 30 potential test-taking minutes wasted by proctors who chose to stand at the front of the room at the official beginning of test segments looking menacing but doing nothing
  • 2 University employees milling around the campus grounds carrying cardboard signs that read: “Quiet, please!”
  • 25 cravings for baked goods (specifically, Beard Papa cream puffs)
  • 4 fashion tops adorned with floppy Reagan-era-style bows at the neck so currently popular among the ladies in Japan ….

A glance down.

  • 5 fashion tops with floppy Reagan-era style bows at the neck so currently popular …


A thought while waiting for Bob and Sean to emerge from the throngs of relieved or stricken test-takers filing out of the lengthier, far more difficult 2-kyuu exam:

The apparition of gaijin faces in a Japanese crowd;
Petals on a wet, black bough.

3 Replies to “Spaz-tistics”

  1. we have beard papa in sf. rockin! did you reward yourself?

  2. Amira – I wish! I’m experimenting with a gluten and dairy free diet and I don’t do things halfway so until I can rule out gluten and dairy as a skin irritant I am cold turkey! It’s annoying ’cause there’s a Beard Papa in practically every train station. Oh, that scent … in July, the Flavor of the Month was White Peach which was OUTASITE!!

  3. wow! we only have two beard papa’s that serve two flavors. you guessed it: chocolate and vanilla…

    gluten and dairy-free, huh? bold. good luck!

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