“I’m bored.” I say. “Can we play a game?” “Okay,” he says. “What do you want to play?” “How about shiritori?” “I don’t know; I’m off shiritori lately.” “Really? But it’s so much fun.” “Eh.” “How about another kind of spelling game then?” “Oh, bollocks. You know I can’t spell. Why don’t you spell words […]
The Glory of the English Language
Gab Gab Gab
From Johnnie Fox’s – a 211 year-old pub high up in the Dublin Mountains: I believe this is what they mean by the Irish gift of the gab.
Card Cake
Sean’s mother: Bring some of the chocolate cake on the train with you. It’s a long ride back up to Dublin. Liv: Oh, I’m fine. Thank you! Sean’s mother: Ah, go on, sure. Sean: Yeah, go on. Bring some cake witcha. Sean’s brother: Do you want some cards to bring with you on the trip? Liv: Oh, […]
Please, Sir. May I Have Some More?
My friend Sean’s grandfather is a hale and hearty 80 years old. He talks politics, walks upright, drives at night, and makes his own jam from the fruits and berries in his garden. He serves that homemade jam with his homemade bread when he sits us down for tea. What an absolutely lovely man. We […]
Hi Diddly Dee
Sean: So next *** *** *** *** *** *** river *** **** basket *** *** Ribena? Liv: … pardon? Sean: I said **** **** racket *** *** Marlena, like. Liv: … what? Sean: “Hi diddly dee, ho diddly dum, ho ho ho, tra la tra lee tra la!” That’s all you hear when I talk, […]
American English to Irish English Dictionary: Part I
American English: Don’t you go in there! Irish English: You’re not to go in there! * American English: Do you want me to call the realtors? Irish English: Will I ring the lettings agent? * American English: He just graduated from college. Irish English: He’s just after graduating from university. * American English: Have a […]
Rain Rain Rain
Eva: So every weather report I see for Dublin is rain, rain, rain. I guess I should buy some woolens and a pair of wellies for when I move! Sean: Wellies? Oh my lord. Wear normal shoes. No one wears rain boots; you must be joking me. Eva: You don’t wear wellies? Sean: I haven’t […]
Your 171-Word Mini Florida Culture Lesson
There are any number of vermin, reptiles and insect life here on the great limerock state of Florida. I hate most of them, especially the snakes. They are horrible and beady-eyed, writhing sickeningly through the grass. They often blend in with the blades so that every step on a lawn could set off a flickering […]
La la la la
A student asked me: “When do you reave to New York?” “Watch my mouth,” I said for the fifth time that lesson. “La la la la la,” – taking extra care to visibly flick my tongue between my teeth. “La la la. Leave.” “Ra ra ra ra.” said my student. “Watch me. La la la.” […]
looova
British Steve (one of my fellow teachers and friends here) says all of his schwa sounds as “oooh.” “Say ‘lover’, Steve!” urges American Mike, his roommate. “Loooova,” Steve will say gorgeously. “I don’t have an accent. I don’t know what you guys are talking abOAT.” says Alan from Ottawa. “But that letter you keep trying […]