Eva, they say, you’re quiet tonight. They get nervous when I’m quiet – these friends of mine – and they’re not wrong to be. I like to talk, and I can do it in twoalmostfour languages. It’s rare that I stop – What’s that? What’s that word mean? Conjugate this verb in dialect for me. […]
Author: ieatmypigeon
- Italy
- ...
Things I Will Never Get Used to About Living in Italy. A Love Rant.
School is out, the rains have gone, and once again, the beach umbrellas are up along the curving beach. It’s officially my third summer on the Italian seashore. Lather up the sunscreen. Rinse off the sand. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. I’m a pro at this Terracina beach life by now. The tourists are back, just as […]
- Food Culture
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Food Slut
It’s April 5th and we’re in Hungary: in Budapest, at an Easter Market, staring down wooden kiosks laden with painted Easter Eggs, bottles of elderflower syrup and strawberry wine; giant cast iron skillets heaped with fat red sausages, rainbow-colored root vegetables, and spicy potatoes. One kiosk attendant stirs a black cauldron full of porky, savory […]
Ten Italian Songs You Would Love if You Knew They Existed
You silly Italians with your love of English-language songs even though you have no idea what they mean! You crack me up. I love you. You make me warm inside, even as I chuckle sardonically each time I hear a DJ attempt to translate a song title – half the time, you dorks are wrong. […]
Friday Fix – Old Man Antonio on Going Out
I’m in Vienna and hungover but it’s Friday and I promised you (or mainly myself) to pop out an Old Man Antonio fix on this holiest of days so: OLD MAN ANTONIO: E, I’m going now. ME: Great. OLD MAN ANTONIO: I’m tired. I’m going straight to bed. ME: No partying tonight? OLD MAN ANTONIO: […]
Friday Fix – Old Man Antonio on Successful Marriages
OLD MAN ANTONIO: All men cheat on their wives. ME: Is that so. OLD MAN ANTONIO: Yes. In fact, there is only one woman a man will never cheat on. ME: Really. OLD MAN ANTONIO: Yes. A pumitrozzola. ME: A what now? OLD MAN ANTONIO: A pumitrozzola. It’s a portmanteau. PU – puttana*- MI – […]
- Italy
- ...
Five Myths About Italy
A few months ago, I was interviewed by Blog Expat for their Expat Interviews feature; a lovely time was had by all. Answering the questions made me reflect deeply on my years living abroad – how did I get here (Ryan Air)? What advice would I give other expats (stock up on Jell-O)? But the […]
Keeper of the Castle: A Play in One Act
CAST OF CHARACTERS E: Writer. American. Early 30s. Breathtakingly gorgeous. OLD MAN ANTONIO: Pensioner. Early 60s. Italian. Haunts the bar where E goes to write. Scatters outrageous, unsolicited advice like so much birdseed. MARCO: Policeman. Italian. Mid-40s. MARCO was once one of E’s interview subjects for an article she was planning to write. FRANCESCO: MARCO’s […]
Usurpers to the Throne
The usual hours and the usual parking spot and the usual teenage boys behind the bar who take bets on what flavor of fruit juice I’ll be drinking today; if I’ll accept the aperitivo or no; if I’ll get any writing done while Old Man Antonio lectures me on exactly what my problem is […]
Blue Roses
At night, there are the nightspots and free concerts. My group of friends tends to meet up around midnight – when my friends in the tourism and hotel industry get off from work; when the nightspots start getting packed – and those of us who don’t live at home* and might not have eaten dinner […]