Classes are winding down this week before the winter break starts. We make Christmas cookies out of construction paper and stickers; snowflakes for the windows, and cranberry chains that result in pricked fingers. I inform the adult students that chocolate “Christmas cake” is a Japanese invention and that Westerners wouldn’t even dream of eating KFC […]
Month: December 2007
Frog Yoga
Like many little girls with generous, well-intentioned parents, I was sent to dance classes. Though I’m sure they were thrilled to see me prancing around in the spangly, sequined costumes of the 80s, even Underwater Saffron Snorting would have been a better fit; my coordination, grace, and desire were absolutely nonexistent. All of my unfortunate […]
La la la la
A student asked me: “When do you reave to New York?” “Watch my mouth,” I said for the fifth time that lesson. “La la la la la,” – taking extra care to visibly flick my tongue between my teeth. “La la la. Leave.” “Ra ra ra ra.” said my student. “Watch me. La la la.” […]
Coins
There is a hole in the left pocket of my black slacks and today several coins fell through it while I was teaching 7 year-olds. The children pounced, but I was faster. “Misette*!!” they demanded. *Show it! I offered a quick flash of a few 100 yen coins. “Ehhhhh!!!” they screeched. “Japanese money!!” cried Mia […]
“Supa Kawaii” Means “Super Cute” in Japanese
Having second thoughts now about my somewhat recent decision to get hip to Japanese fashion, when my experiments result in the unfortunate pairing of ruffled smock-top dresses with turtlenecks or the wearing of slightly blousy sweaters adorned by bows. If it sounds cute, it’s not – at least not on a non-Japanese woman over the […]
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Typical
Hello! How are you? Six years old, very good, but how are you? How are you? … good? Great? Not so good? Good? Okay! Would you like a cushion? No, no, would you like to sit down? Sit down. Sit down. Yes, please! Good girl! Homework! Yes, homework. Open your books. Open your books. Open […]
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Cold
It’s really ungrateful, isn’t it, that I complain about my utilities bill – in December, 4810 yen* – when the standard bill of unfair back home in Manhattan was usually more like $200. The problem, I’ve realized, with being able to save money is that it’s never enough; if I can save 160 dollars on […]
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Scenes of New York
Yesterday, somewhere between Kankokumura and Ishioka, the customary numb silence permeating any Japanese train was pierced when an elderly man began to berate the spiky-heeled and spiky-haired young woman next to him. I understood “ashi*!” and lots of “te” form verbs (often used for commands) and deduced that he was upset with her because, perhaps, […]
Spaz-tistics
Stats taken during the 4-kyuu exam, as collected during sweeping surveys of room 404: 3 test segments 104 questions 40 test takers 17 Caucasians 4 annoying college girls who giggled and bragged about answers they got right in between exam segments 13 moments of panic 6 moments of insecurity 30 potential test-taking minutes wasted by […]
Chomsky Revisited
I should be studying for tomorrow’s big test, but I am not. My sheafs of grammar and exercises would be cold to the touch, if I actually unhuddled myself from my frozen ball and touched them. It is warm to be hunched in front of the computer, the screen emitting a soft, comforting glow and […]